Plans to Repair Crumbling Bathroom “Next Year” Enter Second Decade

For the eleventh straight year, the owners of an Upper West Side apartment have decided to put off repairing crumbling tile, missing faucet fixtures, and a dangerously tilting tub in their sole bathroom. Neighbors say the owners of the small apartment no longer have overnight guests for fear that they may fall through to the floor below while taking a bath. “They claim they’re going to add a second bathroom and want to do all the work at once,” said a concerned neighbor. “Next year.” In related news, HBO has reportedly expressed interest in shooting the sequel to “Grey Gardens” at the home.